July 5th was Amy and I’s first wedding anniversary.  We celebrated, in part, by attending (I officiated) the wedding of two friends in Ohio.

Nick and Rachel were two of my students when I was a youth pastor at RiverTree Christian Church.  It’s nearly impossible to believe that I we have been in each others lives for the last 10 years!

Here’s us on our way to the rehearsal.

The ceremony and took place on the stunning grounds of Stan Hywet in Akron, OH.

I honestly don’t think I could have invented a more meaningful way to celebrate our first anniversary than to participate in the wedding ceremony of these friends.  Not only were Nick and Rachel the first couple that Amy and I had the opportunity to help walk through some pre-marital counseling, but they are going to be living in the Chicagoland area and we are looking forward to many more years of sharing life with them.

And this was just the beginning to our anniversary celebration.  After a couple days in Ohio, Amy and I got to head up to Pelee Island with our friends Matt and Sharon. More on that in the next post.

This weekend will mark year one of marital bliss for Amy and I and it’s be an incredible year in more ways that I can possible say.

To celebrate, we’ll be heading to Ohio so that I can officiate a wedding ceremony for 2 of my former students who will be living in the Chicagoland area and then we’ll head up to one of my favorite spots in the world, Pelee Island, with our friends the Matt and Sharon for some fun and relaxation.

For anyone who remembers and enjoyed the recap from 2008, Amy and I are working on a recap of 2009 and hope to have it finished by the time we come back.

So, you married veterans out there, as Amy and I reflect on our first year as husband and wife and do our best to ask some helpful questions of ourselves as we charge on into the future, what words of wisdom do you have to offer?

There are precious few people in the world that I regret not getting to spend more time with than Mr. Ryan Spencer.

For better or for worse, Fuller leaves roommate selection up to incoming students to figure out on their own.  So, randomly, off a list, with basically no information, Ryan called me in the summer of 2004 and asked me if I wanted to be roommates.  The years that followed produced numerous tales of now timeless Fuller legend.

Few people get me better than Ryan and he never disappoints for new ways to crack me up – often through impromptu songs. This birthday produced yet another one of those amazing Spencer masterpieces.

Submitted for your enjoyment, the musical stylings of Mr. Ryan Spencer.

Amy and I are both networkers through and through.  Each of us has enjoyed cultivating networks and communities of friends in the various places we have lived across the US and abroad.  These are people who have helped, encouraged, shaped, and loved us.  Because we want to do what we can to stay in touch with these people (you?), we’ve decided to compile a 1-page letter about every other month that highlights what’s been going on, what’s coming up, matters in which we hope you will rejoice with us, and others in which we hope you will support us in prayer.

We got our first one out in the last few days.  If you didn’t receive it, there are 2 possible reasons.

1) We had no idea you might be interested in receiving it.

2) We tried to send it to you, but must have had the wrong email address.

In either case, if you didn’t receive our letter and would like to, leave a comment or drop us an email via the contact page and we will add you to the list of folks that we email these letters to.

Thanks for continuing to allow us to share our lives with our – nothing means more.  We’re also hopeful that this might be a pathway to more of you sharing what is going on in your lives as well.

Click the image below to download our first letter.

Last weekend was the annual Malone Thanksgiving – the 5th since I started blogging (2005, 2006, 2007, 2008)

There was a twist this year.  After a decade of gathering at the Hurst household, as our community has grown by marriage and birth, it seemed like a change of venue was in order.  Thanks to the searching labors of a few friends, we decided on the Tara Lodge in Hocking Hills outside of Columbus.  The place was amazing: 7 bedrooms, HD projector theater system, ping pong tables, pool table, darts, karaoke set-up complete w/ guitars, huge yard, hiking trails, hot tub, and on and on.  Basically an amazing place for us to gather.

Here are some pictures from the weekend.

And some videos.

Like every year, there were some dear friends who weren’t able to make it and they were missed, but a good time was had by all as we reconnected, shared the things we were most thankful for in the last year, and chatted about the future.  With more and more kids being born into this community of friends, this was the first year that we really started thinking about what this gathering will be like when it’s our kids, and not us, who are most excited about playing the annual football game.  Weird to think about.

These continue to be some of the most important and special people in my life making this one of my most looked forward to weekends of the year.

I stopped by a thrift store yesterday and was amazed to find a desk that matches one we got a few weeks ago at different thrift store. It was cheap and we had a spot for it, so I bought it.

Now, the other one fit in the back of my car… snug, but fit just fine, so I assumed this one would as well. I was wrong, it’s a little bit taller. So there I am, trying to jimmy this thing into the back seat of my Maxima and 2 Hispanic guys who worked there (risking their jobs by doing so) were trying to help.

I had given up hope when one of these guys pointed to his truck and held out his keys for me to take.

Uh…

He didn’t speak a word of English and the Spanish I know just wasn’t getting the job done. Nevertheless, this guy, who didn’t know me from Adam, straight up gave me the keys to his truck and his insurance card. I let him know that I could be back in “veinte minutos,” and he just replied, “Si, veinte minutos, bueno.”

So there ya go, neighborliness at its finest. He wouldn’t take any of the money I offered him to say thanks and I’d go back and let his boss know, but he’d probably get fired for being awesome.

Muchas gracias Manuel, muchas gracias mi amigo!

Thanks to the generosity of Amy’s team leader and co-workers, she was given the opportunity to work remotely for the last two weeks.  Throw in three weekends, and you’ve got almost 3 full weeks together!

And thanks to some too-good-to-be-true family and friends, that time was jam packed full of fun and memories.

If you missed it, be sure to check out our engagement story, cause that’s where the fun began.

Engaged on Friday night in Chicago, we drove back to Memphis on Saturday, on the phone virtually the entire time and dreaming about our wedding and honeymoon inbeetween (details on both, TBA).

A neighbor gifted Amy and I with two tickets to see “Light in the Piazza” at the Midtown Playhouse.  It was a fun and romantic show and we had a great time.

There was a blizzard in Memphis Saturday and Sunday, so attendance was way down at our morning services, but two of my co-pastor friends took it upon themselves to announce Amy and I’s engagement from up front to much applause and congratulations.  We spent the rest of the day with our friends taking turns holding baby Asher.

On Monday Amy and I were off to Washington DC.  We were there for a church planting conference and had the chance to stay a couple nights with Amy’s aunt and uncle as well as see a few friends we each have there.

Amy was there as a representative of iTeams - making connections with those who are looking for ways to help people get involved in international missions, and I was checking into Ecclesia as a possible resource and partner for Living Hope as we think about church planting.  The conference was fantastic and we were really happy to connect with our friend and Fuller professor, Eddie Gibbs.  Got to see some of the city on Friday afternoon and then we were off to Ohio.

My mom picked us up at the airport and after visiting for a few hours – it was lights out as we were both dog-tired.  Saturday morning we traveled down to Canton to see some of my closest friends.  We spent the day with them, talking all kinds of wedding details and just catching up.  Monday the 9th was to be my 30th birthday so my friends arranged a dinner and a party at my friend Jay’s sweet new downtown office.  Tons of people came to meet Amy, say congratulations, and Happy Birthday.  As usual, I got sick on Sarah’s puppy chow, but well worth it.

Sunday was another full day of cruising around, meeting, and catching up with people – Meysembourgs, Snavely, Solida’s, Neftzer, Gouglers, and many others.

Monday was a full day with my mom and other family.  Amy got the grand tour of Stow, where I grew up and got to meet both my Aunt Fannie and Grandma Ernsberger.

Had an incredible dinner at Macaroni Grill with my buddy Kenny and then ice cream, cake (actually Boston Cream Pie – a personal fav!), and a few gifts back at home.  Amy had written to all my closest family and friends asking for pictures and short blurbs and she compiled them all together into one of the most meaningful presents I have ever received.

We left early Tuesday morning to head back to Memphis where we were set to have a slightly more regular schedule.  Amy was working and so was I and thanks to the generosity of our good friend Lee, we had an extra car to use to help each of us get around to appointments and meeting spots.  Still, the days and evenings were packed.

Tuesday we picked up the car from Lee, gobbled down dinner, and Skyped about all sorts of wedding related stuff with Amy’s parents.  Wednesday we cooked dinner and hosted my house group – that never ends early (which I love!).  Thursday the Donahoe’s, who host Amy when she comes to town, invited us and our friends Matthew and Lisa over for a celebration dinner and then we caught Slumdog Millionaire with Greg and Chandler.

We did lots of wedding planning on Friday and then my friend Ryan from LA flew into town to spend a few days with us.  We took him to Rendezvous to get some good Memphis BBQ and then watched The Dark Knight (it just never gets old).

The night was rounded off with a midnight run to Gibson’s donuts for the after 11 – 6 donuts for 1.25 deal.  Saturday morning we met our friends the Kerrigan’s at Memphis’ best breakfast spot, Brother Juniper’s and then drove around some of the cooler neighborhoods in urban Memphis and even visited an estate sale.

Ryan and I went for a quick run and then the three of us went to see “Race to Witch Mountain.”  No, not because any of us particularly care for “The Rock,” but because Amy was in it.  She did some extra work while she was in LA and in the movie you get to see her twice during the credits.  Have a look!

Sunday morning was filled with plenty of congratulations since it was the first time that many people got to see Amy and I since we had gotten engaged.  Ryan, Amy and I had a great lunch with our friends Zach and Liz and then we spent a few hours (she went nuts!) with Liz as she took some engagement pictures (not currently available).  We actually ended up being late for a surprise engagement party that my house group was throwing for us in the form of an ultimate frisbee game.

We had a great time playing frisbee and then I had the privilege of baptizing a new friend who is on his way of to Fuller.

We spent the evening over at the Kerrigan’s eating up all the leftovers from the folks who have been providing them food while they adjust to having a newborn in their lives and playing everyone’s favorite game, “… And a bottle of wine.”

While I was at staff meeting Monday morning, Amy and Ryan worked from a coffee shop in the Cooper-Young district and got to check out another great BBQ spot – Central.  We went downtown for a few hours to check out some of the sights and walk down Beale St. before Ryan had to had to the airport to head for home.  Amy and I had yet another great dinner with our friends Sam and Allison and then made a short little video for our wedding website (unveiling soon!).

I just put Amy on the Megabus back to Chicago a little bit ago and I miss her already.  While we are bound and determined not to let it take over our relationship, the next several months will be filled with planning and preparation for our big days and those to follow.  We cover all your support and prayers as we try and figure out the future together and plan for a celebration of marriage that will be both enjoyable and meaningful to all those who can celebrate with us.

As a pastor, I spend a lot of my time thinking about and actually attempting “to prepare God’s people for works of service, so that the body of Christ may be built up,” – equipping.

Sadly, the extents to which ministry has been professionalized, consumerism and individualism have distorted our notions of the gospel, and Christendom has undermined the nature and purpose of the church, often serve to confuse us as to what this actually means.

In attractional models of church, many are satisfied with merely finding people to fill slots so that stuff gets done.  Others lay guilt trips on people for not serving enough.  But even when we do the right thing of helping people discover their giftedness and passions and then inviting them into opportunities where those life-giving things might find expression, we often have a view toward the external mastery and refinement of skills and talents so that their use of them will “attract others.”

I would never say that getting better at what you enjoy doing is a bad thing, but I would say that missionally, the equipping of others has mainly to do with cultivating spiritual maturity so that gifts and passions may be stewarded well not with being polished and excellent by socio-cultural standards.

Case in point…

Last night I and several others of my house group had the opportunity to serve at Calvary Rescue Mission in downtown Memphis.  This is an organization that serves homeless and displaced men by providing food, substance abuse recovery, and the deep love of Jesus.  When we go, we get to help serve food and one of us is invited to share a message.  Last night, my friend Sam had the chance to share.

On Thursday I called him and we talked a bit about what was on his heart and what he was planning on sharing.  He expressed some nervousness about feeling “qualified to teach form the Bible.”  To which I replied with something like, “That’s probably the very thing that actually does qualify you to do this.”

Sam doesn’t have a Bible degree.  He’s relatively new to the whole church scene.  And he’s certainly not accustomed to preaching regularly.  But, Sam shared from his heart last night what God has been teaching him through his study of the book of James and the ways in which Jesus is becoming more and more real to him everyday.  Sam (and I’m sure he’s cool with me saying this) is not the sort of speaker that your average church community would put up on stage week in and week out, but sadly it has nothing to do with his not being spiritually equipped to teach.  Rather it’s on account of his inability to entertainingly capture the attention of celebrity-driven, linear thinking, consumer-oriented folks (I don’t excuse myself from often falling into this category).

In the same sort of vein, one of our friends from the mission sang a solo.  His voice was not good.  He had absolutely no stage presence.  And he wore a sweatshirt that read, “Jesus is Awesome.”  Again, this is not the sort of guy your average church would want leading others in worship, but is has nothing whatsoever to do with him not being spiritually equipped to do so and everything to do with our misconceptions of what it means to be equipped.

Despite their cultural-defined techincal inabilities, grace, hope and love overflowed from both Sam and our soloist friend.  All those present left encouraged and changed as Jesus met with us through the ministry of these two guys.  It grieves me to think of how often we miss out on the ways in which God uses those we would never expect (or perhaps more shamefully, prefer).

Time to come clean. I can hide no longer. The Amy G. I have mentioned and interviewed, well… we’re actually a couple. I know, never saw it coming did ya?! That being said…

This was a whirlwind of a Valentine’s Day weekend for us. Though Amy has traveled all over the world & lived in both Los Angeles and Chicago, she had never been to NYC. My brother and his girlfriend live there, so for Christmas, I got Amy 2 tickets to the city. But, as has been the case with all our other times being together, we sought to pack as much in as we possible could.

Our journey began in Indianapolis where I got to meet some of her close college friends as well as a bunch of people she used to work with at Global Partners. Then, we traveled to NYC where we were able to spend time not only with my brother and his girlfriend, but 2 of my good friends who were in from OH and DC.

We took the Staten Island Ferry to view the Statue of Liberty.

Saw ground zero.

The flat iron building.

And went to the top of the Empire State building – an unforgettable experience!

We also got to see Grand Central Station and Time Square.

For Valentines Day dinner, my brother managed to get reservations at a swanky Tapas bar that (though sadly small in size) offered some amazing tasting cuisine.

Quite serendipitously, we got to spend time with a good friend of mine and a good friend of Amy’s, both of whom happen to be part of the same church community that we were visiting on Sunday morning – and got to have lunch at the Seinfeld restaurant!

On Sunday, we traveled down to Princeton together. We got to see and stay with 2 of Amy’s good college friends, Dave and Holly and their 2 little girls. Dave is working on a PhD at Princeton and they were good enough to take us by “Schuller Field,” recently named for a good friend of mine who passed away a few years ago after finishing the first year of his MDiv there. Here’s a few pictures of small plaques fixed to two benches at the field.

The next day we got to take a nice stroll through Central Park, followed by visits to the coolest looking Mac store around and FAO Schwarz (remember the piano scene from Big?) where Amy got to choose any stuffed animal she wanted for her Valentine’s Day present.

Monday afternoon we traveled back to Chicago where we got to spend the evening with our friends Noel and Ashley in Lawndale.  Tuesday morning it was back to Memphis for me.  Told you we packed alot in!  Some more pictures here if you’re interested.

About 10 years ago some friends started a tradition of gathering the Saturday before Thanksgiving to cook a meal together, play football, and to share with each other all that we were thankful for from the previous year.  This tradition has become a linchpin in the life of our community of friends.

More than simply attending, it is not uncommon for us as a group to do everything in our power to help others find a way to to be there to share in the day.  There is nothing magic about the day, but I do believe that there is something sacred about it.  It is perhaps the day of the year that I look most forward to.

Yearly, this community continues to grow.  Many people in our community are in the season of life where babies are coming into the picture.  These little ones add an incredible dimension to our community.  We have had conversations in the past about raising kids together and it was really cool to listen to Caris, the oldest kid in the group (almost 4), refer to all these people as “uncle” and “aunt.”

My friends Ryan and Heather have new born twins and I would venture to say that the rest of us cared for them more during the day – holding them, changing them, feeding them, and attending to their cries, than Heather and Ryan.  They are awesome parents, it’s got nothing to do with that, but everything to do with the fact that for us as a community there is no aspect of life that is not shared.

As always, the day of feasting on food and fellowship was followed up by a big ol slumber party back in Canton at a couple different houses.  The event on Saturday is special enough in and of itself, but some of my favorite memories are created after as we play games, continue to share meals, have coffee, share stories, and visit local favorite spots.  Man, I am already ready for Thanksgiving ’09!

Enjoy some pictures!

Me and my small group had the opportunity to host a Halloween party last night for a bunch of international students from the University of Memphis, among others.  It was an awesome time.  Many of the students brought their own native food.  My personal favorite was the Indian curry, man was it good.  A good time was had by all with plenty of games, mummy wrapping contests, bobbing for apples, and conversations galore.  It was a packed house and we managed to use every single plate, bowl, and glass that I have in the house.

Liz took a ton of great pictures, which you can find here.  Her personal favorite from the evening…

And mine…

Victorious with a bobbing time of 1.2 seconds!

I was able to get away this past week to connect with some friends and family, first in the Outer banks of NC and then in Chicago.

Babs (Adam) and Carrie were celebrating their 4 year anniversary and invited some friends along.  So, I joined them and my friends Sean and Julie – and their 6-month old little girl Lucy, for a few days.  One night we went out to the beach at night and chased down crabs with buckets, plastic shovels, and a swimming pool net.  We tried to boil one of the little guys, but it turns out that there’s a reason that people don’t spend their time eating these particular crabs.

Then, it was off to Chicago where I got to spend some time with my cousin and her fiance whose wedding I am honored to be performing next month.  Also got to see my friend Josh and his baby girl Norah.  Rachel, Josh’s wife, was working so I missed out on seeing her, but man Norah was a trip.

Check out the video!

Thursday night I got to hang out briefly with my buddy Branden who, after living in So Cal while I was also there, has been living the high life in Chicago for just over a year now.  Branden is always good for a story.

To top it all off, I got to hang out with a friend from Fuller, Amy, who just moved to Chicago.  We toured Millennium Park and took an architectural boat tour of downtown on the Chicago river which was awesome.

Not a bad way to spend a week.

I don’t really like it when a full week goes by and I don’t have a chance to blog – it’s like I get creatively constipated and then I don’t know where to begin.

Aside from just getting back into the swing of things and playing catch up since returning from Afghanistan, I have been busy doing a variety of things – getting the new house settled, wrapping up the online course I have been teaching, and training for a 1/2 marathon, along with other life-randomness.  So, where to start?  How about the 1/2 marathon.

My New Year’s resolution was to get a 1/2 marathon under the belt before the year’s end.  I found out that there is one in Akron on Sept. 27, and since I had 2 friends doing the race (one doing the full marathon and another the 1/2), I decided to give it a go.  Afghanistan came at a bad time in terms of training, so I hit it hard as soon as I made it back.  Well, the left knee, as it has been doing for years, continued to give me trouble and I had to go see an orthopedist.  He read through a previous MRI and did an x-ray.  You should have seen his face when I told him I was training for a 1/2 marathon in 2 weeks?!  He actually said, “You’re running on this?”  I just started rehab this morning and we’ll see how much that helps.  Next stage is a fluid injection to make up for the cartlidge that is damaged and/or missing, and then surgery will be a last resort.  So, sadly, no race for me, at least not this month.  There is another one here in Memphis in December, so perhaps then.

Semi-related, as a part of training and moving to midtown, I have been frequenting the downtown YMCA, which is a great facility.  There is a trolly that goes back and forth, though it ends a mile from my house.  The other day, I ran down to the Y, worked out some there, and took the trolly back, and ran the last mile.  It’s a cool part of downtown Memphis that I was excited to experience for the first time.

My friend Joey stumbled on a newspaper article last week about a gathering in a local establishment called Beer and Bible, facilitated by Phyllis, Tickle, someone I have been wanting to meet ever since moving to Memphis.  I had the opportunity to go and participate in the discussion last week and just loved it.  It was about the most eclectic group of folks you can imagine who used the 7 deadly sins as a jumping off point for discussion.

I also had the chance to accompany my friend Jon and a few other guys who do some work with FCA at Carver HS to a football game.  Carver is a school in urban Memphis with few resources and about 30 guys on the team.  The team they played is an over-resourced suburban school with about 30 guys/position.  Needless to say, Carver got crushed, but it was fun to be back on the sidelines of a HS football game.

What else?  With the help of some friends, lots of painting at my new place has gotten accomplished and I also added a few pieces of furniture as I seek to create an inviting and hospitable sort of place.  Pictures forthcoming.

The class.  I am in the final stages of grading final papers for the first go-around of an online class for Fuller – The Emerging Church in the 21st Century.  The class was filled with great discussion and insights.  The majority of students feel as though they have a lot more clarity on what the EC discussion/movement is all about and I have reall enjoyed helping them to explore their questions, misgivings, and thoughts in general.

Lastly, while the website leaves a little to be desired, the atmosphere at Republic Coffee doesn’t.  I am writing this from their location – one I very quickly become a huge fan of.  If you’re around midtown, check it out.

Well, thanks to this lovely crew (not pictured, but equally awesome are: Jon O., Greg J., and Russell M.  I managed to get all my stuff in my new home yesterday afternoon.

And the unpacking, sorting, and arranging has commenced.

I am in need of a fridge, some furniture, and some other odds and ends (Bueller, Bueller…), but I was pleased to find (after 4 months of separation from my stuff, which lingered in storage), that I had most of what I needed for the house.

If you are someone who needs my new house address, feel free to drop me a line and I’ll be happy to send it to you.

Now, I wonder who likes to paint????

Living here has already paid off.  I am less than a mile from my good friends, the Watson’s.  Around 10:30 last night Matthew called and asked if I could come over and stay with Nathan, their 2 year old.  He and Lisa were gonna have to take Elias (their new born) to the hospital as he was running a 101 fever.  I was so happy to.  In my mind, this is a major part of what “living in community” is all about.  You are close enough to those you want to share life with that you can be there for one another.  Far from experiencing this as a burden or bother, this request was precisely the sort to make me feel “at home.”

Thus begins the journey of discovering the truth of this popular bumper sticker…

I promised Amy from David Ford’s label a while back that I would blog about his most recent video.

What can I say, it’s a great song and a great video.  The video didn’t quite strike me the way “Go to Hell” did, but it’s still go that simple-cool thing going for it.  I enjoyed the lyrics which communicated a sort of hopeful yet honest sense of regret.  Because of a recent conversation with a good friend, I got hung up on one line in particular.

Everybody wades through the same colored *$@%
But it doesn’t drag everyone down

The friend I was talking to feels absolutely broken.  Feelings of emptiness, loss, fear, doubt, and frustration are dominating this persons life right now.  This person has been far (at least from their perspective) from God for a good long while, but in the midst of this brokenness, their inclination is to run to, rather than away from, God.  I don’t know what to attribute this to other than grace.  There is often no telling what our reaction to adversity and trials will be, but David is right – since the pain of life is common to all, we must ask ourselves, how come some get drug down and others don’t? But I’ll tell you what, having a community that loves and supports you sure doesn’t hurt!