lifeasmission

What I Miss

October 17, 2005

I was just talking to this girl who I had only previously met once before. For some reason in the midst of our conversation I was impressed with just how much I miss the pastoral role that has been such a big part of my life until coming to Fuller. I don’t want to discount the upsides of grad. school that I am enjoying – class lectures, writing papers, critical thinking and dialoguing about some of the most weighty issues that exist in the universe and others, but the demanding schedule just isn’t friendly to the pastoral/relational spirit in me.

Don’t miss what I am saying. I am not saying that I miss being a paid, pastoral, church, staff member. I just miss what naturally came with that sort of role. On a daily basis I was sharing life experiences with other leaders and students, I had the chance to really engage with people as to where they were at in life, in their relationship with God, and in terms of other relationships. We could pray together, laugh and joke together, cry together, and be confused together. It’s that togetherness and engagement with the trials and joys of life that I miss so much. It is a source of life to me.

I don’t want to paint too bleak a picture. I have friends here, we talk and pray about life. But given the temporal nature of why everyone is here in the first place and the fact that just doing school comprises about 85% of everyone’s life, these relationships and conversations can only run so deep.

As someone who has the benefit of being able to look back on past experience and remember how much he took for granted what he now covets, let me offer this bit of advice. Treasure the relationships God affords you and take them seriously. The ups and downs, failures and successes, boring times and exciting times, conversations grand and small, they all hold intrinsic value. Whoever you are and whoever you are involved with, I pray that you may enjoy more and more the adventure investing in others by giving your life away.

Posted in: church, friends